Excellent question. And best answered via a super sexy interperative dance about class war, consumerism, totchos, and the fleeting triumph of love. 

But the short answer is: "We're not dicks."

Yeah, we know what we like... but more than anything want to get you on what YOU need.   

And the long answer is: If you could milk passion out of the ether and mold it in to everything you wanted a shop to be, that would probably be us. Ok, I just made that up. The point is that we're passionate about what we do, and that bleeds into everything we touch. But not in a gross way. 

Are we for everyone? Maybe not. But then... maybe you're not everyone. 

-Watts

 

 


Watts
Title: Master Blaster!
Rides: Mostly junk miles. Mostly.
Eats: The rich.
Drinks: At least two heart-healthy bottles of wine a night
Says: "I'm out."
Likes: Ed Abbey. Gravel. Bags on bikes. That one girl.
Dislikes: Suffocating routine. Suburban ennui. Gravel. That one guy.

Christian
Title: 2015 Greenway Champion...of the world, Craig.
Rides: A fine line. But mostly road and mtb.
Eats: The stuff crammed in the back of the staff refrigerator.
Drinks: Fire water and Topo Chico
Says: "So, the shop that I worked at in California/Oregon/Washington..."
Likes: Sleeveless t-shirts, custom steel, investment cast lugs, cats, tall trees, Abbey Tools, vast expanses, pew pew.
Dislikes: Sleeveless cycling jerseys. Sweaty triathlon bikes. Dog shit on the tires. Haters.

DARLENE
Title: Mama Duck
Rides: Circles around you, kids.
Eats: Whatever it is, the whole shop smells like it now.
Drinks: Them spritzer things.
Says: "Y'all ain't right."
Likes: Christmas lights. When Watts turns off his devil music.
Dislikes: Watts' devil music. Gluing tubulars. Spiders living in bikes.

Dorothy
Title: Lil' Dorrit.
Rides: (laughs and cracks a dirty joke)
Eats: Primarily chips and crisps.
Drinks: Like a goddamn fishy fish.
Says: "Hiya!"
Likes: Haggis. Bangers and mash. Neeps and tatties.
Dislikes: Creepers. This mom jean trend. Suburbia.

MANGO
Title: Superfreak
Rides: Badly.
Eats: Chow. Whatever you just dropped. Panties.
Drinks: Water...out of an UNFLUSHED TOILET!!!
Says: Bad things. Very bad things.
Likes: Licking your legs and feet with his nasty ass breath. Women's underwear.
Dislikes: That little dog across the street. Men with beards. Men without beards. Men.

PAUL MUAD'DIB.
Title: Kwisatz Haderach
Rides: Giant Sandworms
Eats: The Spice
Drinks: The Water of Life
Says: "LONG LIVE THE FIGHTERS!!!!!"
Likes: Fremen
Dislikes: Harkonens